Holiday (n) leisure time away from work devoted to rest or pleasure; eg 'I recently spent nearly three weeks on holiday in Botswana'

The plan:
Nine people, two 4x4s, seventeen days exploring the wild spaces of Botswana.

The route:
Cape Town. Witbank. Palapye. Makgadikgadi Pans and Khubu Island. Planet Baobab. Maun. Drotsky's Caves. Nguma Lagoon. Maun. Moremi. Maun. Witbank. Cape Town.

Saw some things that blew my mind, things that made me question the trivial nature of my day-to-day life.

A few things Botswana taught me:

• I can drive through 50 degree heat and live to tell the tale.
• I can survive for eighteen days without wearing makeup or endlessly straightening my hair (in fact, I think I prefer this laid-back me).
• Extreme heat affects one's alcohol tolerance.
• Hippos are inexplicably attracted to Chris Wilkinson.
  
• Management, even at rest camps in Botswana, will never tell you about a complimentary breakfast.
• Lions do not really sound like the Goldwyn-Mayer one does.
• Bat guano between your toes feels pleasantly like beach sand.
• Beetles, even ones bigger than my thumb, will not hurt me.
• I do not get airsick in a 4-seater Cessna.
• Never underestimate the goodwill of a family of inbred hillbillies.
  

A few adjectives:

• Sweltering (the weather)
• Sweaty (me, us, everyone)
• Scenic (er, the scenery)
• Sexy (le Boyfriend)
• Sozzled (brought back a few cocktail recipes)
• Smiling (Botswana's entire population)
• Starry (the night sky)
• Serious (getting stuck in a swamp for five hours)
  
• Surprisingly sad (crossing the border back into SA)
  

Regrets:

• Just one. Boyfriend gave me (along with a signed copy of my favourite blogger's book) a lovely bottle of Moët et Chandon for my birthday, which careless, thoughtless silly silly me accidentally left behind in Maun.
• Maybe two – the fact that it is currently unfeasible for me to pack up my life and go travelling around the world for the foreseeable future.

Congratulations to Lo and Kim, who got engaged in a baobab. May you continue to have sex.

The biggest thank you, with bells on, to the rock star C-team, Candice and Chris. You were, hands down, the most amazing travelling mates ever. May Vodka Fizz flow from the heavens, and hippos become fully aquatic and trouble you no longer.